How to Be a Player

How to Be a Player Reading Time 7 Mins

Written by Danielle Derne

Do you think you have become a player, want to improve your game, or are you dating a player? Today we’re divulging everything about players in the dating environment. Figure out how to spot and avoid them or become one.

What Is a Player?

A player is someone who doesn’t want or like commitment. Players are typically good-looking and attract as many potential partners as they set their mind to with confidence and high self-esteem. Other characteristics of a player are having a large group of friends and always being busy or hard to reach.

How to Be a Player

Woman having fun.
Becoming a player.

Usually, people try to learn how not to be a player but don’t let others judge you if you want to learn how to become a player. You could have many reasons for wanting to experiment with this approach.

Perhaps you have always been in long relationships, and now you just want casual flings and nothing serious so you can take a breather. Below you’ll learn some of the things you need to remember when becoming a player.

1. Join multiple dating apps.

If you want to be a player, you can’t settle for one dating app. Players put themselves out there every chance they get. They want the possibility of finding a match to be high, and they don’t want to find just one person.

They’re open to meeting as many people as they can. So if you want to be a player, make sure you have a profile on all the popular dating apps.

2. Dress to impress.

Players are known for looking good, which gets them a lot of attention. Make sure you’re up to date on fashion trends and that you’re putting together outfits that your potential matches are going to be attracted to. If fashion isn’t your thing, make sure whatever you wear is clean and smells good; that always gets you bonus points.

3. Be sincere.

It’s okay if you’re a player, but be honest about it. Don’t play with other people’s feelings by lying and telling them you’re looking for a relationship when you’re not. Make sure they know that you’re not interested in anything serious and are only looking for something casual.

4. Have fun.

Players don’t take things too seriously. They just want to have fun and go with the flow, letting whatever happens happen. If you click with the person you’re hanging out with, it could lead to more than just a date, but neither of you is thinking about that at that moment or planning too far ahead.

5. Know when to stop meeting with someone.

Players are constantly switching it up and rarely see someone more than twice. They especially avoid seeing the same person more than once in a short amount of time. Even if they’re really attracted to that person, seeing them more than once a week, for example, could send the wrong message.

If you’re trying to be a player, make sure you avoid frequenting the same person, and make sure to keep switching it up constantly.

6. Keep meeting new people often.

Players have a wide selection of potential matches waiting for them because of all the mingling they do. They like to meet new people all the time, and they flirt with everyone they meet. If you want to be a player, you need to break out of your shell and get comfortable meeting new people anywhere you go.

7. Get good at flirting.

If you’re trying to be a player, you need to be good at flirting. If you’re still working on your confidence or don’t think your looks are enough, your flirting game needs to be strong to score all the people you’re interested in. The better you flirt, the more people will be interested in you.

How to Stop Being a Player

Girl in the ocean.
How to stop the player attitude.

Perhaps you’ve been a player for a long time and are ready to settle in with someone and have something more long-term and serious. We’ll help you learn how to stop being a player below.

1. Ask yourself why you want to stop.

Maybe you want to meet someone special to build a relationship with and have a family with, or maybe you’re tired of your family not taking you seriously because you’re always with someone different, there might be many reasons, but knowing why you want to stop is crucial to making it a reality.

2. Delete dating apps.

If you only want to be with one person, you need to take things seriously and delete all dating apps when you’re dating someone. This is a sign that you respect the person you’re with, and you can always download them again if it doesn’t work out.

3. Delete people you’ve met when having fun.

People from your past should stay in your past. If you had something casual with someone and you’re trying to start a new relationship with someone, delete those people.

If someone from the past comes back, it could cause unwanted problems, trust issues, or jealousy. Leave your player tendencies behind for good, and purge those people from your contact list.

4. Only date people you meet offline.

It’s so easy to swipe on anyone on a dating app, if you want to stop being a player, you need to meet someone you actually connect with. Most often than not, you will make a stronger connection with someone you meet in person.

5. Focus on personalities and not on looks.

To leave your player tendencies behind completely, you must ensure you’re falling for the person’s personality, not their look. Appearances are important to most people, but make sure it’s not the only thing you like about the person you’re dating.

Try to find someone you have things in common or can have good conversations with before choosing someone just for their looks.

Signs They Are a Player

Most people want to avoid dating players. They tend to hurt your feelings more than they make you feel good, so knowing how to spot them is good. Below, we’ve included a list of the signs they are a player so you can beware.

1. They mentioned no commitment.

The most obvious sign that they are a player is that they’ve mentioned they have no interest in commitment. Players never want to commit to one person because they like being with as many people as they can keep track of.

Some people are afraid of commitment or have commitment issues, but it tends to present in a different way, or it’ll come up in a more serious conversation. A player will tell you immediately that they’re not looking for anything serious in a very casual way.

2. They’re hard to reach.

Players don’t want to spend time talking to you throughout the day, asking you how your day has been or what you’re up to. They’ll reach out when they want something and get straight to the point. They’re hard to reach, they take a long time to answer when you text them, and they often ignore you.

3. They have a flashy social media account.

If they are a player, they will have a very busy social media account. They like showing off and letting people know they are always busy and surrounded by others. You will see many photos of this person at parties, surrounded by beautiful people who always have fun.

4. They don’t share personal information.

A player has no intention of allowing you to get to know them. They share the very least about themselves, only giving you the bare minimum so you have a general idea of who they are. You’ll know the basics, but never more.

5. They sporadically reach out after a while.

We’ve established that players are hard to reach; they’ll usually reach out if they choose to talk to you. It will also be after a while because they have so many people to keep track of, and to keep up with that, it takes them a while to circle back to you.

Faqs 

  • Do players have regrets? Players don’t have regrets when they’re in their player phase, but later on, when they exit that phase, they tend to regret how they treated the people they were with.
  • Should you date a player? It might be tempting to be in a relationship with someone who has been a player for a while, but it’s not worth the time you will invest in this person. Most likely, eventually, they’ll go back to their player-dating lifestyle. If it has been a while since this phase in their life, then yes. But make sure he’s a sincere person, and he’s fully open with you.
  • Are players bad people? Players aren’t considered bad if they’re honest with the person they’re having fun with. If a player isn’t being honest and leading people on, then yes, they’re bad people and should be avoided.
  • Can a player stop being a player? If a player is a good player and knows how to drive others’ attention and attract people, then it’s hard for them to stop doing what they’re doing. If they’re not as good, then the likelihood for them to stop playing around is high.

In conclusion, being a player or dating a player doesn’t have to be bad, and you shouldn’t judge someone for it. Players can be reformed, and just because they were once a player, it doesn’t mean they still are.

Remember, as long as they are honest about their intentions and past, it doesn’t make them a bad person, and you can still give them a chance if you’re okay with how they choose to live their life.

Danielle is a senior writer thanks to her experience and writing expertise. She succeeded as a political journalist for five years, thanks to her passion for politics. Although still interested in politics, she realized political journalism was no longer for her and shifted to content writing. Some of Danielle's hobbies include going on long walks, checking out the latest exhibits at the art museums in her area, and wine tasting. She also likes to keep up with as many political debates as possible due to her past in political journalism.

  • Author of: How to Be a Player
  • Written On: July 11th, 2023

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