All About Wingmen

Wingmen seem to have an easy task, but in reality, they’re being heavily relied on to successfully pick a girl, or several girls, approach them, and make you seem interesting enough to want to talk to you. They need to find the perfect balance so that they are charming and trustworthy without seeming too attractive themselves so as not to seem like a better option.

Read more below to learn all about wingmen, the benefits of having one, and the qualities they need to be a good one.

What Is a Wingman?

A wingman is someone, typically a friend, who will help you get girls when you go out. He’ll help introduce you, get their numbers for you, and talk you up to them so they’ll want to meet you and spend time with you.

Benefits of Having a Wingman

Don’t take the possibility of having a wingman for granted, it can be very beneficial to have one, and it definitely never hurts. Below are the benefits of having a wingman.

Puts you out there when you can’t.

You might be having an off day or something going on in your personal life that just doesn’t have you in the mood to put yourself out there. If that’s the case, your wingman will do it for you so you can still get the girls, even when you can’t put yourself out there.

Pushes you to go for people you normally wouldn’t go for.

Your wingman is likely someone who knows you and your taste in women. However, if he has your best interest in mind, he might push you to go for someone you normally wouldn’t go for if he sees potential in them.

They might have a great quality that you would typically overlook simply because they’re not your usual type, or perhaps your wingman thinks you could be interested in trying something new. Whatever the case, he will help you push your boundaries and go for new experiences.

Keeps her friend occupied.

The girl your wingman may be trying to help you get may have a friend out with her, and she’s not going to want to leave her friend by herself. This is why it’s very beneficial to have a wingman when you go out so that he can have your girl’s friend, or at least keep her entertained while you connect with the girl you were after.

Makes it seem like you’re out having fun.

Girls are more likely to want to talk to someone who seems like he’s having a fun time. They won’t want to approach the lonely guy at a bar. Although there’s nothing wrong with going to a bar alone, it just doesn’t help make you seem more approachable.

Your chances of having a girl come up to you and talk to you are increased if you’re out with a friend, preferably a male friend. For the same reason mentioned above, if she sees you with a friend and she’s out with a friend, this will make her feel better about not leaving her friend by herself because they will both be entertained.

Qualities a Wingman Needs to Have

Some wingmen are simply average, and some are very good. Below are the qualities a wingman should have to be good at what he needs to accomplish.

Encouraging.

A good wingman needs to be encouraging. Sometimes you don’t feel like trying to entertain a girl because you’re tired of it not working out, whatever the reason, so a good wingman needs to encourage you to continue giving it your all and talk to new people.

Problem Solver.

Women can be very tricky at times, so a good wingman needs to be a good problem solver, for this reason, and for other unexpected things that may come up. He needs to be able to get you out of any situation and fix any problem that may present itself. Imagine chatting with a girl, and you suddenly don’t feel good and have to rush to the bathroom, meaning you awkwardly keep her waiting. Your wingman needs to be a good problem solver in this situation and cover for you, or take over and continue to sell you until you can resume chatting with her.

Good Communication.

Your wingman needs to be a good communicator. He’s helping you get girls, therefore chatting with them before you get to them. A girl isn’t going to be interested in talking with someone who can’t carry a conversation well, and if she’s not interested in talking to your wingman, she’ll likely never get to talk to you. Your wingman also gives a slight impression of what you might be like, so their communication skills are important.

Has boundaries.

A wingman needs to have boundaries, or else he might get you into sticky situations you wish you could have avoided. For example, he needs to ensure that the women he is pursuing for you are single and available, and stop pursuing them if he learns that’s not the case. He also needs to have boundaries because he has to respect that the girls he’s getting aren’t for him, they’re for you.

Wingman Duties

Listed below are some of the key duties your wingman will have.

Initiates.

Your wingman is going to be the initiator. This is why he must have excellent communication skills. He needs to be an outgoing and confident person as well because he’s going to have to approach the girls you’re after.

Talks to everyone.

He’s going to approach everyone, not just the prettiest girl. He knows there might be a hidden gem where he least expects it, and he’s determined to find her for you.

Presents themselves.

It’s important for your wingman to make sure he presents himself and doesn’t just dive into talking about you. Although you should be the star of his speech, the girl he’s trying to get for you needs to know who she’s talking to. She’ll feel more comfortable if she does, making her more inclined to make your wingman a successful one at that.

Evaluates the girl.

Your wingman is expected to bring back an adequate candidate for you, not just any girl. Even if the girl he finds is someone you typically wouldn’t go for, she should be someone who has good qualities. Quality over quantity is key here, and it’s not about how many girls he brings you.

Watches from afar.

He finds you the girl, initiates for you, but then he lays low and lets you do your thing. He sticks around to make sure things go well, but he only watches from afar, preferably without being noticed.

 Lets his friend have the girl.

No matter how much your wingman hits it off with the girl or how attractive he finds her, he’s going to let you have the girl no matter what. He has clear priorities, and he knows the girl he’s after is for you.

Knows when to leave.

Your wingman needs to know when it’s time for him to leave. Eventually, if you’ve hit it off with the girl he got for you, he’s going to have to let you do your thing without him, so he needs to be able to pick up on when it’s time to do that or take a hint.

Who Needs a Wingman?

Everyone could benefit from having a wingman, but people with the following characteristics are going to need a wingman more than others.

Someone who is shy.

If you’re shy, you probably have difficulty approaching people, especially new people. A wingman will come in handy in this situation because they’ll not only help you pick who you’ll be talking to, but they’ll also help make the introduction and maybe even get the conversation going. That should be plenty for you to take over and be successful, even if you’re very shy.

Someone who says they don’t want to meet anyone.

We all have that friend who says they don’t want to meet anyone because they’re too busy to entertain a relationship or because it’s just not what they’re looking for right now. However, we know that they’ll have a good time, even if it’s just with someone who wants something casual like they seem to as well. If you’re someone like this, then a wingman will be very helpful.

Someone who has been single for a while.

Someone who hasn’t been in a relationship for some time may need a wingman to help them get back out there. It’s very beneficial for someone in this situation to have the support of a wingman to take some of the stress of talking to new people off them.

Someone who is too picky.

As their wingman, you’re going to have to be prepared for him to not be too inclined to let you help him, however, it could be very good for him to do so because it will force him to give the girls he may typically not choose, a chance.

Concluding

Now that you know all about what makes a good wingman, make sure to remember that your wingman must possess the four qualities mentioned above. He needs to be encouraging, a problem solver, have good communication skills, and have boundaries.

These are a must for your wingman because without these qualities, you’re better off finding ladies on your own. He needs to compliment and benefit you at all times and always have your best interest in mind.